Dwarves

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What’s the best offensive punk band of all time? I’m taking nominations, but the Dwarves have definitely got to be in that conversation. Angry Samoans got boring too fast. The great G.G. Allin took his act too seriously. I’m partial to the Dictators and Canada’s unjustly neglected Forgotten Rebels. But the Dwarves, man, that’s some freaky stuff. In fact, their masterpiece, 1990’s Blood, Guts and Pussy, was just short of terrifying. With the infamous cover featuring naked women covered in blood, and a dwarf doing something unspeakable to a rabbit, it featured minute-long buzzsaw-punk songs like the statutory-rape anthem “Let’s Fuck” and the inexplicable “Skin Poppin’ Slut.” And, of course, any time a band brings AIDS into joke-song territory, as they did on “SFVD,” you can be sure they’re casting deep for collective societal outrage. The weird thing about the Dwarves is that despite their fuck-you lyrics, they arguably are the least stand-offish of punk’s great prank bands. Live, they basically want to have fun, do a little crowd surfing, and, weirdest of all, bond with the audience while they crank out song after song. Lead singer Blag Dahlia, who now lives in the Bay Area after starting the band in Chicago, comes across as—god forbid—friendly. And after 25 years, they’re not slowing down, with the album dwarves Are Born Again expected this summer. - Steve Palopoli sanjose.com

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